The New Moon Solar Eclipse - Awe, come on! You're schittin me!

Words.  Set # 76 counting down.

(Power) Confident

adjective

1. feeling or showing confidence in oneself; self-assured.
2. 
   

(Force) Arrogant

adjective

1. having or revealing an exaggerated sense of one's own importance or abilities.

*************

On December 31st
New Moon Solar Eclipse to end the Decade and start the new Decade.
I'm not sure what it means but the Druids and Pagans do.
I'm glad that somebody keeps records and tabs on long standing things celestial.  I find it fascinating but not enough to study it.

They say that New Moon Solar Eclipses,
"They uproot us, surprise us, and get us moving."

I'm just looking forward to it happening as it rarely does.  

Happy New Year's Eve y'all!

**********

Disclaimer: All the events below happened. All the details are forgotten.
The names? True.
Most that were involved are mostly dead. Not all dead.
This is a long post.

*********

I spent the morning pondering this day, today the last day of this decade.

As I was shaving using Gillette Foamy as the soap, I hear my Dad Speak as plain as day in my memory: “Awe, come on! You're shitting me!”

I have not heard those words in decades.
It most likely was sparked by the fragrance of the soap.
The same one he taught me to shave with.

I normally use a non fragrant, holistic blend of moisturizers that don't support the New England Patriots as I am a Buffalo Bills Fan.
lol.

Anyway, my Dad was no angel. 
 Never professed to be. 
 He had a 6^th grade education.
Being “Left Handed” in Catholic School in the 30's and 40's was no thrill ride.
Left handed people were of the devil or so that is how he described that it was described to him.  He remained a Catholic till the end.
I respect that.

I'm told he was told that phrase as the back of his hand was hit with a stick.  Yard stick, pointer, ruler ... I've been hit the same but for different reasons. 

We had something in common I never realized before - a few meaningful years of Sister "Mary" Whatever and her command of the ruler.

I'm glad the School I started in dissolved at 5th grade for me.
I started in 6th in Public control.  What a difference.

As for my Dad, school lost a brilliant mind and created a hoodlum.

Wars of the age taught him the streets.
The streets taught him how to scrap.

His father took him to the woods and taught him to hunt and find solitude in the forest. 
Places that other Polish Men of industry gathered to hunt 50 miles away from Buffalo.  A place my brother still hunts to this day.
A place where my Dad desired his remains to lay. 
Land he fought for.  Land he taught me to reverence.
Harvest he also taught me to respect and give glory to God for.
He got 1/2 his wish.  The Military got the other.

The Korean War made him a Veteran.
A whiskey bottle in a bar fight in the 50's took his nose … at least all the bone in his nose.

All of this before he got married and became my Dad.
I never quite thought of his journey this way.
I just was a rebelling teen.
He always told me: “Do as I say, NOT as I do.”

An “Artful Dodger” he was, I'm told by his closest cousin Sonny.

Forced to retire early as a Crane Operator for Bethlehem Steel when that company restructured before they dissolved.
(Their lawyers stole the last parts of his retirement too.)
I learned from a distance to not trust retirement plans and the entities that "promise" them, especially those controlled by a Union controlled or controlling a Government.

He was a sailor on the Midway, the USN Carrier museum in San Diego.  Someday soon I'll walk her decks.

He grew up on the streets of Buffalo during the 1940's & 50's.
By 1965, we were living out on the farms.
Green Acres type of home built in the 1800's.
Everyone associated with him (the 5 he hung with) were all good people.

Even the evil looking and evil acting ones.
Don't judge them, they are someones little boy.

All I can say is that I was raised around conversations that had a lot of questionable conduct points within their stories. KKK to D.C./Baltimore, to Railroad Yard scrapping events with Italian and Polish Mafia structured schemes and then talk would change to Family reunions, gatherings, crazy antics and horseshoes.

I cannot say things or repeat things as I truly cannot say they are true.
Beer and Liquor clouds stories and the things that surround those stories.
Not from what I drank but from what others did and I witnessed.

My Dad was never in the paper or around those deeds BUT, somehow, the characters involved sometimes would be at a card game, relaxing and enjoying their existence. And boasting.

Hopefully I can paint this picture or set the stage setting:

A Card Table in A Shelter (Cabin, RV Trailer, Garage, Kitchen)
This is not to be confused with other card tables at wedding receptions and holiday parties.

Around the “hunting” card table (mainly 4) where individuals from all walks of life, out hunting and killing night fall hours in Deer Camp with some beer, sometimes “other” drinks, dinner and ALWAYS cards.

The deck of cards was my Dad's Bible. He knew them. He counted them. He challenged himself by playing with double decks to make the games interesting.
He also knew the “others” by the way they played their hands.
A true Master.

Sometimes as the liquids of choice flowed, the “others” would have “Loose lips that sink ships” as the Navy would promote it's members to refrain from when on the shore.
My Dad was a good listener.
If he wanted more from the story, he would most times utter the phrase:

“Awe, Come On! You're Schittin Me!”

Ah, the egos of men that have been challenged by that phrase. MORE info would always follow.

I just sat and listened. “Do as I say, not as I do” was the mantra that ran through my head.
Watch. Listen. Learn.
Pay Attention.

I learned to not be in places that have things going on in them. Especially Bad Things.

The stories I “heard” at the card table(s) helped set many stages that I witnessed in my “Growing UP”.

Settings, that as a young man on the worlds city streets and then on the ships, piers, wharf's, warehouses, alleys and pool halls as a sailor BEFORE I was married and had children to care for.

Places: There are many.
I've known many High People in Places too. lol

Just because I was never in places where things HAPPENED does not mean I was not in those places just BEFORE those things happened. I have a way of not being places I was previously at. We all do.
Not sure why or how but I'm thankful and grateful for every “NEAR” experience.
Artful Dodging or as I always preferred, Guarded & Protected by Angels.

So, as I begin my new year with a clear slate like every other day, I'm reminded of a time when my Dad was sitting on the edge of my bed talking to me. Actually, two times.

The first, was a Halloween evening in the 1970's. More towards the middle of the 70's.

Dad had just returned from the towns epicenter (2 stop signs – not lights, signs) and the hoopla that was going on this particular October 31^st.
Supposedly, the towns four roads were a blaze with hay bales just about ½ mile out in 4 directions.
Blocked off for a “4” Town tomato fight I heard.
Four different towns of mostly “guys” arrived to enjoy in the festivities I came to understand.

Kids from the furthest reaches of our county came to visit this particular eve I am told.

Seems a bunch of my “friends” were then corralled and called into the Volunteer Fire Hall to be questioned by State Troopers, the local County Authorities and the Towns Elders.
My Dad knew some but not all of the “hoodlums” but did not see me.

It is because, I was not there to see anything.
Yes, others cared to know “What's UP?” and walked towards the commotion.
I did not care to know and when I heard the blast and the alarm, I started walking home.

I even took the long way home. Through fields away from street and car lights.
From where I walked, it was dark. I heard distant sirens. I saw many a distant flashing lights.
I heard “when” the bank alarm was silenced … but I was not there.
Sounds echo off the edges of woods.

I could not tell a lie and my Dad believed me.
He did say: You schittin me?
No, no bullshit Dad. I was not there.

We had a No Bull shit rule.

If I lied, I had “Zero” protection.
If I told the truth, I was still made to tell the truth in front of authorities. 
I did not realize how much that training would serve me in my future at my first inquiry, Trial or Captains Mast.  Calm and cooperative for sure.

So even though our conversation was concluded this Halloween, did not mean all was finished because of the magnitude in a small, quiet country town.

He then left me …
“Alright, sleep well. Your friends aren't.”

I learned early about becoming the average of the 5 I hang with.
My average is much better and way up now. :)

********

The second was at Easter, 1979.
I woke up and Dad was standing at the end of the hospital bed.

He asked:
“I have one question and you better not lie. Were you drinking?”

“Yes”, I answered shamelessly.
“Did anyone get hurt? Is Pat alright?”

“Yes and No”, he responded out of order.
“Pat got some scratches but no one but you is hurt.”
He then continued … “If you would have lied to me, you would not have walked out of this hospital.”
I believed him.

No other time have I done such a stupid act.
I was not busted. No one knows how or why.
God does and I did hear by “word off the street” that it was a miracle I was not charged with DUI with a blood count 4 or 5 times the amount (by the time I got to the hospital – hours later).
It was so high they thought the machine was malfunctioning and gave me a pass I understand.  What else could it have been?

And the words: “Are you schittin me?” were heard by me years later in a card game as the story is still a miracle I share with my Dad. We all survived. We grew. Love prevails.

I was changed by the accident and today it's outcome has partially placed me on military disability.
I live in a world where there are no accidents.
Things don't just happen, things happen just.

All the “good” things that came from a bad evening of choices:

* My USN career changed a month after the accident.
(concussions and schooling - Headaches)

* My Dad witnessed an Artful Dodge on God's Scale.
 (I was busted – and protected by divine)

* God's directional change for my life was witnessed and my life was again spared for reason. 
I found out more on a star lit night in the middle of the Atlantic several months later.

Who's and What's reason?    I can only guess Sources reason(s).
One of many times I can recall vividly and in some cases, nightmarish still.

A reason I walk the A.T. - to talk with the ONE who knows the most and the best for my next adventure towards REASON.

***********

On the scale that I measure myself against now, I'm about done with the PRIDE level.
Stories of close calls and the past are pride driven, at least it seems that way for me now.

I'm ready to don COURAGE as my banner going forward.

OLD AGE AIN'T FOR WIMPS!  :)

Here are the “Levels” as found on Pages 68 and 69 of “Power vs. Force” that I'm following.

I'll list them from Top to Bottom.
I'm working my way UP from Bottom to somewhere above bottom.

Enlightenment
Peace

Joy

Love

Reason

Acceptance

Willingness

Neutrality

Courage

Pride

Anger

Desire

Fear

Grief

Apathy

Guilt

Shame

Like I said, I believe I'm between Pride and Courage.
Working my way up to stay at a new level with my life and world.

That is why I am going to hike the Appalachian Trail.
Hindsight 2020 Tour.
I need a long journey, Forest Bathing.  Shinrin-Yoku
To be taken in by nature. 

 Embraced by what continues without assistance from anything but Source. 
Well almost without assistance. 
I need Annette to mail me packages from time to time.  LOL.

But for the sauntering in the woods, Walking Through Forests,
To be of the same with it all as an observer.

Not sure if I see Waves or Particles or Both. 

Since I have a choice, I'll choose both.
I believe in Wave-Particle Duality.

********
I could not get hunting and jokes out of my mind. 

 Here are a couple of classics.

Da Yoopers sing a classic that depicts antics that I can believe were based on true stories.
2nd week ofdeer camp 

Bananas at Large sing a similar song: 

Da Turdy Point Buck

None the less.
“I'm a deer hunter how do ya do, and I'm gonna tell a deer hunting tale to you.” Lol.

Only one year growing up did I remember my Dad getting “Skunked”.
Zero Harvest.

Family story has it that both my older sister and I turned away beef the first time because we were raised on venison. 

I guess it's in my blood. Literally.

So as life would have it, I do know how to properly prepare for, continue through and be successful at harvesting a deer if I need to. Humanely as possible. One shot, unaware, fell in place.
Dealt with the remains, respectfully until they are partitioned, processed and placed in the freezer bags and jerky.

I'll possibly hunt someday in my future but it would be out of respect for the craft.
There are plenty of shelters around here in the hills that accept a harvesting gladly.
A deer can help many family, including mine if the harvest is good.
We shall see if I can “Create” a safe farm area here that is “Nature” cared for and provides everything that multitudes of Deer, Rabbit, Squirrel, Partridge, Quail, Dove and Turkey would enjoy playing in.

Then if too many show up, we may have to begin harvesting. I do like jerky in many flavors. :)
No Opossum, Raccoon or Blackbird Pie for me though. Lol

**********

In closing this New Years Eve, I'm going to set my sights on a new me going forward.
I can never be matched with anyone or compared to anything.
I do not desire to.
What others think about me is none of my business and shall remain that way.

As for the Legacy that I desire going forward to become of all of this?
A “Legacy” is something we're creating every day, whether we realize it or not.  It's what we do when no one is watching that matters the most in our lives. 
100 crunches before coffee and a walk each day to better my tomorrow.

So with some realization and reasoning, I'm going to ponder this question all the way to my 60^th Birthday somewhere in Georgia or Tennessee or North Carolina or Kentucky.

What is to become of this?

I'll walk off that last mountain (for the day) and hopefully have an answer that I'll be able to work on going forward till my demise.

Peace, Joy, Love
The reasons for the Seasons.

I trust that you find all that you seek this coming year.
Thoughts do become things so choose yours wisely.
I'll do the same.

I'll begin the maintenance on the family antique, a 3 thread Bernina Surger and then I'll start on my antique Singer machine to start sewing today, so my focus will be more on that in the coming weeks before I begin testing all my gear.

I also have my first stove design to test.
Keeping the 32 gas jets under .06mm and then angling them to form a vortex jet flame at .06mm (+/- .002) and a non-measured angle.  I'll be altering the angle (if needed) with tests.

If it matters, I'm going to shoot for finding an exact .06mm pin to create the can stove.

Moving forward into a new decade.
Enjoy the New Moon Eclipses to mark off the calendar day.

I wrote earlier that others believe that:

"They uproot us, surprise us, and get us moving."

"They" say correctly. 
I am uprooted, surprised and moving forward.

I've decided to use my Kindle account at Trail Journals to receive email (template) updates.  Short in nature.  Tied to pictures and thoughts from the day with occasional links to videos on my YouTube channel.  I believe they can be separated as deemed necessary.

I will also then comment on "The Trek" as myself and I'll write more candidly and frank at times. I believe the others on that site speak in a no BS fashion using all the words in the dictionaries too.
I respect each for who they are.  

Crazy wanderers and adventurous types excited about the self inflicted misery that can happen by surprise. 
"The most fun had with long walks in pain,"
I've heard it described.

This journey is already beginning to help me.

"You didn't come into this world.
You came out of it, like a wave from the ocean.
You are not a stranger here."
~ Alan Watts
(Found this on the Forest Bathing Site, it fits)

Till then, stay safe.
I'll write with you next year.
Make it YOUR best year ever!
(Link goes to a Jim Rohn 4:22 video - 4 hours and 22 min)  :)
Life changing stuff.  Good Stuff.  lol

~ Kindle

What brings one Hope? - a deeper ponder

Words. Set #77 counting down.

(Power) Observant

adjective

1. 1.

   quick to notice things.  Keen.
2. 
   

(Force) Suspicious

adjective

1. having or showing a cautious distrust of someone or something.

***********

What Brings One Hope?
Is there a key that unlocks an awareness of Pure Love?
Why do nose and ear produce whiskers?

Questions to ponder ...

**********

I've been mulling over the data I have concerning my first month on the trail.

30 to 31 days.
8 to 10 mile days (or less)
Zero's every 7 to 10 days.
Near-o's being considered instead w/ Zero in the Woods.
Resupply points ... Bounce Boxes ... Costs of Postage

Since I'll be starting in NYS, I was particularly looking for blogs and writings about that area and areas.  Been looking for a while now.

Yesterday, I found this blog entry entitled:
New York - The State no one ever warns you about.
It helped immensely.
It can be found by rummaging around on the site:  "The Trek" 
They are soliciting for writers, bloggers and vloggers.

This "test" I'm performing each day is getting to be, routine.
Not mundane just routine.  I guess I wanted it to be. 

Anyway, "The Trek" has some elements to it that tugs at me to blog and possibly vlog there instead of Trail Journals.
Do I really want to comment in a video?  Editing?  Power consumption, memory storage and upload concerns?

Right now, I'm just looking at using an email template to post to Trail Journals a week or so after I've been someplace.
I'm not jonesing for FaceSpace to find me in real time.

The only "real time" that I care to spend electronically is with my wife in texts and "face time" sessions if the networks will allow.
Calls, texts and face time from in the woods at base camp each day.   Those moments will make it better and might also aid to early withdrawal from the trail too.  Time will tell.

Times and technology are much better than Pay Phones, Snail Mail and USN Fleet Mail with time breaks in between and letters getting out of order.

That makes for a good leave off this morning.
I've a coffee waiting for me to drink as the 100 crunches were felt and were welcome to be felt this morning.  Core is developing nicely and will support my efforts going forward for sure.

Moving Forward,
~ Kindle

Hope Springs Eternal - Books and Memory

Words.  Set# 78 counting down.

(Power) Receiving

verb

gerund or present participle: receiving

1. 1.

   be given, presented with, or paid (something).
2. 
   

(Force) Grasping

adjective

1. greedy; avaricious.

**************

While walking the other day, I really listened to the quality of the voices blended (in one microphone) to create this song.  Pure gold.

See the Changes

She has seen me changing
It ain't easy rearranging.
And it gets harder as you get older,
Farther away as you get closer.

And I don't know the answer.
Does it even matter?
I'm wonderin' how.

Ten years singing right out loud
I never looked was anybody listening.
Then I fell out of a cloud
Hit the ground and noticed something missing.
Now I have someone,
She has seen me changing,
And it gets harder as you get older,
(and) Farther away as you get closer.

And I don't know the answer.
Does it even matter?
I'm wonderin' how.

Seems like something out of a dream
I had years ago, yes I remember screaming.
Nobody laughing
All the good times
Getting harder to come by without weeping.

Now I have someone,
She has seen me changing,
And it gets harder as you get older,
and Farther away ........

************

I don't know the answers.  I'm wondering ..... how?
(Oh the cursed "How's") 

I see if I learn this song, possibly the word "how" might fade or change to "now".

*************

Thinking thru the Bounce Box theories and studying boots.

Just trying to corral ALL the spinning plates of thoughts that are needed in planning this journey.  

In a lot of ways, I can see where day to day will dictate the day, & schedules will not stand against even their daily routine with Mother Nature and unknown terrain to me.  
Flexibility should, and most likely will be the normal day.

I do not want to miss being on the trail as I've read many hikers can and have.  Others before me have found out and shared in their journals that in effort to complete the trail, they missed about 60 to 80% of their hike.  It was pre-consumed by planning and executing plans.  The beauty and awe was missed up until their "AH-HA!!!!" moment.

*********

So, bounce boxes and pre-planned mail drops.
Gear swaps from Spring, to Summer, to Fall with snow being reported somewhere on the trail during all three seasons.
Ultra-light gear should allow for a few common sense survival and comfort items.

When to swap out shoes that get from 500 to 1000 miles on them on average.

The bounce box is a way to move my gear to myself as I see fit.  If unopened, it just bounces up the trail to the next section.

I'm thinking of having 13 boxes of stuff pre-prepared.
The same number of Map Sections I have from National Geographic.

Also, I'm doing my best to wrap my head around having my "Zero" days in the woods.  Something I believe I would prefer.

Zero days are days with no hiking just rest.  
The costs of hotels and all is the issue with me and most all of the campsites on the A.T. allow 2 days of camping.
Hassle seen, no 110v AC for charging devices.
I have a Jeep wind up cell phone charger that could be converted to charge a battery pack on rainy days.
I'm also considering a Solar battery pack as well.

Plenty of places near the trail offer free or inexpensive showers and I have a Zodi Shower unit for the woods from WAY back that I use the tree hanging bag as my camp water cache.  

Showers and mail drop pick ups, that is my biggest town draw from this chair right now ... I know the trail and the food cravings will change some of that.

**********

As for Hope,
This time of year (Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years), has imprinted in me a type of confusion.

It was not too long ago, I was resting in Hope Lodge with my best friend who was undergoing harsh treatments of Chemo weekly with Radiation Daily.
Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. 
The Trifecta as I call it.

We lived through the same time period with others who did not have as good a prognosis of promise and hope as we had been given. 
I was there for support and I tried my best as my mobility and body was not in any shape but pain at the time. 
We also had very limited resources which happens when both cannot work. 
I do not desire anyone to go through that but many do.

What a difference a few years makes but the period and places remain a memory reminder to me at a very deep level.
I do not have to look far to see that others have life handed to them a little or a lot worse that I have experienced.
I'm grateful and thankful I've seen what I've seen and touched what I touched.
It all was necessary to have me arrive safely to today.

Still changing myself one moment at a time.
Rearranging some memory stories to have better endings as they too were all necessary to have me arrive safely to today.

Reading three books right now as each has a different draw for where I'm at in my day of planning, workout, life chores and rest.
Food (Prep, Packaging & Preparing), Specific Trail Logistics and My Mental Release with Relax.

Projects:
00% complete: Tarp Kit to put together for a February Test
50% complete: Quilts of 3 to be created for same Feb test
05% complete: 2 Stove Creations for efficiency tests

I love it when a plan comes together! :)

Enjoy the Day!
Make it all you plan or don't plan to!
~ Kindle

The Body Resilient - Candidly Frank

Words. Set #79 (109 or so days) 

(Power) Liberating 

adjective

1. freeing a place or people from enemy occupation.

   • providing a release from a situation which limits freedom of thought or behavior.

     
     

(Force) Restricting

verb

gerund or present participle: restricting

1. put a limit on; keep under control.

   deprive (someone or something) of freedom of movement or action.

*********

... this Word countdown is kinda like a short timers chain.
(That link above is a google search.)
Here is a very short story that explains it.

This count down reminds me of a time in my life where I started counting days, weeks out to leave a situation.
This is a shit ton more reverse to all that.

I'll be leaving a FANTASTIC situation to saunter and meander in the WILD woods for 6 months.  A tougher situation.

I know that if I'm to continue on this planet of ours, I need to be able to continue on this planet, healthy and healthier.
No one can do my push ups or sit ups or stretches or walks.
No one else is placing the fork /straw/fast-food in my mouth.
All fingers point to MOI to do ALL THINGS about it.

If I am to physically help in any way, shape or form on this very steep incline and plateaus of land with many, many, many trees and rocks and debris behind this dwelling, into my 60's and beyond, I will need to learn how to become an old, skinny mountain man.
Cantankerous was my past.
Curmudgeon is not in my vocabulary ... any more.

I can think of no better way than to walk the steps of others into the Appalachians.  Go and see and venture and ache and realize the  pain it takes to walk 2195 miles plus.
Understand what it takes to place 5 million meaningful steps on an adventure to the next phase in ones life ... growing old.

If the weather co-operates, I might even be able to do a little 'bush wacking' and trail maintenance here before I depart on my trek.  That should help.  Create a 100 or 150 yard trail up the hill by raking, trimming and nipping some saplings to a level where I have a huge rock to sit on and think a bit before coming back down.  
As it is true, the only way to get in hiking shape is to hike.
I could have a 100 to 150 yard training site built and tested by the time I leave.

I know that I'm pricing out a Sherpa Pak type of setup for my journey that will serve me well when I get back here over the many Springs, Summers, Falls and Winters that I might be alive going forward.  I understand that a small bulldozer is being considered as well if the trail is deemed to be worth allowing our 4 wheeler or 4x4 truck to ascend the hill.   I choose myself to do the job.
It is not going to be easy, it's going to be worth it.  :)

This all brought me to do a mental body check of how do I feel this 28th day of December of 2019.    Not too bad.  A few kinks to work out before coffee.  I can report that snap - crackle and pop every morning are a normal.  A feel a storm on the horizon.
The spine is what it is. 
In "Flux" and straightening and strengthening while straightening.

Knee pain is gone now that I'm a few weeks into when it decided to "snap" back into place.
My shoulder injury pain from May when I toppled backwards and jammed my elbow into my ear has become almost gone.
My last visit to the chiropractor helped work my shoulder back into socket.  Since then, it's just been motion and routine that is getting the last few tendons and sinew to "twist" and "snap" back to where they belong.  I feel very little pain when performing push ups now.
Stretching and range of motion exercises .... Daily is the key.

So that brings me to my first point of this post, The Body Resilient.
As I performed my morning modified crunches before coffee, 50 was easy.  I decided to change things up a bit for the next 50.
This means, I took my heels off of the ottoman and placed my feet flat on the floor, knees bent and did 50 more crunches.

I felt that.  My abs were not ready for the change and that is good.

Now, to understand, it was just August when I could barely get on the workout mat to perform JUST 10 the first time, and now 50 to 80 have been yawning sessions and getting to 100 then 140 was no issue as of late.  That is, with my heels on the ottoman and back on the floor.
The body will get accustom to what ever we place it in and stay there.   I have to change things up every so often and right now, that seems to be every month starting January 2020.

Which book did I get that from?  Not many but a few.
The lesson of "mixing it up for the body" used to be a coach secret and for the most part still is as even I forget it from time to time.

As for coach?  I coached little league.  I coached adult slow pitch beer league softball, just as I learned from some great coaches.
I even tried my hand at umpiring.  
One game was all I needed to know that Judging was not something I desired to be a part of or do.  

No matter the call, two sides see it too. 
Being judged under that type of Crowd microscope is not where I desired to place myself.  I'm not Alpha enough to want to.

Now I coach and judge myself.

Back to the Body Resilient and being candidly frank:
We have to move and our bodies are designed to heal themselves IF allowed.  Movement is not an option, it is a daily requirement.

For our body to function correctly, all parts from time to time need to be placed into action and asked to perform, and it is all an internal process.  Mind to hair tip to toenail.

Desiring to is where Our Will comes in.
It is easy to eat an apple.
It is just as easy to not.
It is easy to swap out an apple for a Snickers bar for it satisfies you.
At least that is what the boob tube, text, ads, shelf cartons filled with bars and the bars themselves promote to say.

It is easy (now) to do 100 crunches before coffee and it is easy to not do.  Well, maybe easy for others to not do.  My mind gives me reminders "before coffee" that 5 minutes is not a long time to spend on the floor for myself, the rest of my life.   It is not easy for me to skip now and I like that about myself. :)

The abs (I'm told) can be worked everyday as they serve everyday.
Work the core sometimes hard, sometimes easy as a stretch but everyday can be handled by the abs.

Now with the New Year approaching, resolutions to diet always are on the commercials.  Seen it happen for far too many decades.
(I watch commercials with the mute on now as the volume gets louder so that you can hear the commercial in the kitchen at the fridge in between program breaks)

Why?  Cuz it's big business helping big people yo-yo.
Up and back, Down and back, Up and back, Down and back.

The solution starts from within.  Self esteem which leads to self motivation and self control and self correction. 
Self, self, self, me, me, me.

Yes, it is selfish but in my selfishness, I now can do better and more for others.  With less pain and a smile most times.

People believe that they do not matter to themselves.   
I was there once too.
I started my resolution in August because I knew back then that today would arrive and I would not be starting but continuing at this time of the year.  
Yep, figgered that all out by myself in August 2019 that January 2020 was going to arrive and all I needed to see back then was who I desired to be when it showed up.  
So far, not bad. Dad Bod is dissolving.

I can honestly say I'm not stopping what I'm doing.  I see, feel, breathe, enjoy the benefits of how I feel vs. how I felt.
I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and guess who was to blame?  Just moi.  What changed?  My daily routine.

As one mentor (T. Harv) puts it:  
(and I'm paraphrasing from memory)

If there is something out there that you desire
and
YOU cannot bring yourself to go for it
then
just sit in your pile of what you've created and point to yourself saying: "Mini-Me, Mini-Me, Mini-Me"

Everyone that goes for what they want gets ... what?
What do they get?

YOU won't know until you try.

One must become BIGGER than their problems.  Self-motivation.
AND if you cannot motivate yourself then do it for something else.
Find a mentor that can push you to new levels of thinking, breathing, living.  Mine are on tape, CD, DVD and now YouTube.

"BECOME" the one YOU NEED your future to be.  
Time travel in your mind and follow the steps that are revealed to your destination while allowing the Universe to place the next "transition gift" or "trial gift" that will build you to become what you desire to become.

The past is over.  Get over it and remember it was ALL needed to BE TODAY and NOW that YOU are HERE and IN.  
If change is needed, then change.  No gun is held to hold you.

No concern of HOW just Do. 
(Worry about HOW is just needless fear, take one step, even if it is just a "thought".  It is still a step and the most important one.)

If you are wrong you will be corrected "IF" you are paying attention. 
Not paying attention? 
Well, I'm still learning from not paying attention.  I think we all are.

Going forward:
"Thoughts become things.  Choose good ones."  ~ tut.com

It is honestly that simple.  Not always easy but simple.

If you trust in your: (Maker, Source Energy, Guardian Angel, Jesus, God, Universal Law, ) then place your request, denounce fear and walk towards your desire.  Watch the miracle(s) as they appear.
That's how I do it and I've not been disappointed by Source.
I just wish I would have seen it all earlier and worked with it better.
I do have NOW and can make a new end.

Moving forward,
~ Kindle

I love waking up to profits! - and more Nitty Gritty

Words.  Set # 80 counting down, About 110 days till hike start.

(Power)  Constructive

adjective

1. 1.

   serving a useful purpose; tending to build up.
2. 
   

(Force)  Destructive 

adjective

1. causing great and irreparable harm or damage.

************
"Don't beat yourself up ... time makes decisions for us all."
~ Some Hallmark Actor

The sound from my background in the room as my wife watches a show.

***********

Since "constructive" appeared today, I'll start there as I've been too well accustomed to destructive behaviors and habits.

I am learning to trade the London Breakout while I sleep.
How that is done is:
* To have a good idea of which way the GBPUSD will go after the morning open in London, UK (3 AM EST)
Speculating at about 8 PM EST the previous day.

Odds are that from 3 AM to about 5 AM, the GBP will generally choose it's DAILY low or high by then.
Noon EST is when the London Market Closes.

I felt that market sediment was pushing the market higher today and I guessed correct.  :)  One in a Row!  lol  Whoop!

My account risk of .3% returned 3.6% when I woke up this morning.  Actually, the price blew thru my take profit point and I could have made a considerably amount more had I been at my desk instead of in deep slumber.  
Rest is important to me and market moves like this will happen again and again.

I'm just enamored by the Currencies now especially since some semblance of direction is known in the UK after Boris's announcement recently which took 3.9% of my account. 
(it became personal - lol)

I'm almost at break even for my unawareness goof. 
But honestly, I do not have a camera on 10 Downing St. and have no desire to care what the man says at what ever time of the day he desires to address the media. 
Reminds me of another lunatic that manipulates the markets with his tweets.

My beef is with the computers that are set to trade on news events and swing the market wildly on speculation ... but then again, I am a speculator too - I just cannot move the market wildly.  I just have to prepare for it to happen and today I have a BETTER way to manage the account.  

I would not care about the .3% I "could have" lost up to 10 trades worth of losses.  
I am seeing that "my system" can allow for up to (10) .3% losses while waiting for the market to follow it's path and make the 3% (and beyond) that I'm seeking.

Odds for my casino game are as follows:
Start at 1:10(+) or 2:10(+) or 3:10(+) ... risk to reward.  

If 10:10(+) is hit which would be 10 losses in a row, the Ponder Rule is set as to find out why.  
Break even has to become a level of account loss that I need to stop at which is for me 3% total losses, before deep analysis and correction.
Stop!  And PONDER.

More back testing is needed for sure and I'll get to that later,
if I desire a computer to make money while I hike that is.
$3.50 a mile would be a goal and is possible in a moving market. :) 
Come on GBPUSD, EURUSD, EURGBP !!!
Daddy needs a new pair of hiking shoes!!!!   lol

************

So what did I learn this morning that was different?
Nothing new.  
The market does not care how I feel and I do not need its permission to become wealthy.
I'll take freely and often as the market allows ... for the market will do, what the market will do to screw me, that is for sure. 
Losses happen so just don't let it happen too often. lol

I'm a disciplined trader, and I like that about myself.  :)

**********

Hiking:

The Nitty Gritty book has raised better questions and given better answers to details that would take years of reading thru blogs to find.  Although it gives some great answers, it also raises better questions for each of us as individuals to use as we move towards "OUR Own" system or systems of sleep, cook, walk, survive and arrive well at the end of our journey.

I'm liking a lot of the choice questions that I did not consider ... ever.

It's not a "how To" book as much as it is a "choices to think about" book.   I'm enjoying that. 
HYOH even in the planning stages which is now starting to consume more hours of my day.
I'm glad it's Winter.

*********

Another inexpensive book that arrived today is entitled:
"Everything Except Corn Pasta" by Carol Wellman

Carol goes deeper into the ultralight culinary science of getting the correct amount of quality nutrients from my meals in time with the day's workout and not make it a "Bonk" experience.  I've bonked already with my diet just with the new routine I've adapted to. 
Quality nutrients working in harmony with my daily fuel needs of 4,000 to 6,000 calories a day while hiking or about 2# of food per day.

I know it will all start coming together soon. 
I'll just keep moving forward.

~ Kindle

 

The Day After Christmas and Walking the Hill

Words. Set #81  with about 111 days till I set foot on the trail.

(Power) Intentional

adjective

1. done on purpose; deliberate.
2. 
   

(Force) Calculating

adjective

1. acting in a scheming and ruthlessly determined way.
2. 
   

********

Today was a nice day to hike the hill behind the home before dinner.
Glad the mud was more stable than in the spring.  It gave me a chance to see where the run off is mostly starting from above and behind the home.

Actually, it should be considered trail blazing cuz there are no trails ... yet. 
Briers, brambles and prickers.  Sticks and twigs.  Rocks and mud.
All the fresh leaves made it a little challenging but my hiking stick worked well on the steep sections.

We made it about half way up the back property which was enough with the day light we had left.  As you might be able to see, the sun is about 3 fingers from going over the hills in the distance ... which works out to the best guess @45 min. as I did not have my phone as a clock or weather date, temperature and dusk/dawn clock.

I honestly thought that the hill would be training me for the trail and I think now that the trail is going to train me for this hill behind the home.  There is a lot to document and move.  22 acres worth.
I'll take my vacation first to get in shape then I'll start in 2021 working the property.  Seems like a good plan from my couch. :)

We got down from the back hill in time.  Lots of daylight left and a sunset to watch.  Little slippage and no trail dancing on the way down.  The "Big Stick" worked as advertised.  I can see getting a different end section for days like today.  Having something stab the earth a little would have helped.

I've got it on my list for when I order my back pack soon.

*******
Other than that, just another day after Christmas.  No where to go.
Finished the main sections of stitch rip-out on all 3 quilts.
Getting ready to cut out the sections and then Serge them together.
Printed the books for the Serger so that I can give it a little maintenance before testing.  Things to do, things to do.

Enjoy the day!
I did.

~ Kindle

Finding ones way going into 2020 - Following ones own advice

Words. Set #82 and counting down.

(Power) Eternal

adjective

1. lasting or existing forever; without end or beginning.
2. 
   

(Force) Temporal

adjective

1. 1.

   relating to worldly as opposed to spiritual affairs; secular.
2. 
   

*********

Merry, Happy Christmas!
I trust it is, what it is to and for you.

***********

A few weeks ago, while walking on the treadmill and only listening to Pandora and watching the wildlife out the back window of the home, I clearly heard the "whew" that the artist (Roger Waters) expelled before starting the song "Mother" by Pink Floyd. 
I could feel the finality of his voice as he proceeded to sing his life.

I lived many of the parts of what he describes. 
My mother did intervene and interfere with my entire life but my teen life, a bit too much.  It was the 70's and she dressed me funny too.  I think I could finally pick my own clothes at age 17. 

Everything else was first Hand me Downs, then Goodwill and finally Ames, the major discount store in our area at the time.

One takes what they are given and school photos show the progression. :)

For Roger to reveal it in song must have been tough.  To repeat it and repeat it and repeat it in concert must have been tough as well.   Having it fill your coffers with gold ... must have made it easier.
I also think that way about James Taylor's "Fire and Rain".
He gets to relive a tragedy of his life over and over again.

I was in and around London in 1979 when the album "The Wall" was debuted.
Many a shipmate ventured there via train to witness the opening.
I had already visited London the weekend before and was going on a closer castle tour.
The mother ship (Boulder) was moored in Portsmouth, UK. 
I choose to venture alone.  Took an Air Ferry to the Isle close by.
I was on the Isle of Wight fulfilling a dream envisioned from a lyric in a song. 
I walked the cobblestone streets, I noticed rolling fields, cottages, quaint villages, pubs, sheep in the road with rock walls and castles.

"Every summer we can rent a cottage
In the Isle of Wight, if it's not too dear
We shall scrimp and save…"   thank you Sir Paul, the isle is a quaint place indeed and I'll return.
I smell a possible return in April or May (or best weather time between April and October) 2025.  
When I'm (and my best friend are) 64. :)

A lot there to share this Christmas morn.

**********

The Wall:
Of course, several copies of the album were on the USS Boulder and many a shipmate and I were learning the songs by ear. 
Key of G for the most part made it easy.
Music always brought out the musicians stuck on a ship. 
The echo in the tank well deck on the Boulder served us.
I owned at the time a 1978 Hohner HG-12. 
A 12 String with a natural finish. I never mastered it but I did have masters play it and make it sound like I wish I could.

As for Floyd:
I honestly think the album got too much air play and for that reason, I still cannot stomach some of the songs.
It's all good as I've worked out my "wall" issues with my Mom.
We talk in a No B.S. language now.

Hiking:
I have needs to look up precise data on the following subjects -
*  Chiropractors near the trail  (Locations, Costs, Hours, Walk-in's allowed? ... etc)
*  Sunrise and Sunset for the journey attached to each day of my segments.
*  Monthly Ave Temps (at elevations) along my each day segments
*  Plot precise location data in our GPS for parking locations on the entire trail (Garmin Base Camp)
*  Daily financial walking needs by location and season.  Best guess: $3.50 a mile.  Pay self as U go.

Miles, locations, days, weeks, months, Leap-frogging to next start location(s) ... etc
Bounce boxes, mail drops, clothing choices and swaps with the seasons.

Still have new shoes to purchase and break in ... much to do.
Also, writing.
Should I tone down my language or be what flows? 
Advice I've gotten is to be self.  I'm beginning to agree.
What "self" do I desire to become? is the better question.
I trust it will happen as it will.
Following my own advice to get to where I desire to be as others cannot and should not be telling me where to go.  lol.

But as for younger eyes, should they be reading my blog to begin with?
I'm not venturing to speak to Grade Schools or below but if it happened, I would not turn down the gig.

This adventure "Could" be a spark for that age group in some ways.
Scouting ways, Life Growth ways, Survival ways, Dream building.

I guess I'll write a disclaimer in my "about" page on Trail Journals.
I'll think through my set up there and "allow" it to happen.

I'll keep hanging with the 5 that I choose as my mentors. 
I find their advice still meaningful.
Change them up from time to time as well as my adventure moves forward.

I've noticed that the hiking journals I gravitated towards seemed to be Veterans who were out venting.
Down Home Truth - Raw - Little Filtering - No B.S. kinds of information.  No Candy Coating.  I believe I can do that candidly and without pool room/wharf/speak easy/navy language.

It seems that the military does that to some of us if not most of us.
We have this ability to get to the point of "Irkness" that will get ones attention quickly.  Even with our choices of words.
I just forget to stop being "Irky" some times which then becomes assholiest annoying until change happens.
Within me or outside of me, change does always happen.
Sometimes in my favor, sometimes not.  It's calculated.

Example from my past work lives:
I've worked for 3 (Three) different States with their rules and also with our Federal Gov. with it's paperwork to get things accomplished on grand scales.  Corporate, Education, Penal, Administration and Justice departments.

One incident:
Reading the MSDS and the "proper" handling of chemicals in an around the workplace (which is a personal employee responsibility), it would not take me long to see that storage and mis-handling of common workplace compounds would be an issue.  Happened everywhere I worked.  No blame or care as to why or how it happens, it just does.

What is one to do "IF" they have been trained to safely contain and handle air propellants and solvents?  

Complain? Bitch? Point it out?
 or do as I do.    
I forced accountability and responsibility by leading.

I placed a purchase request for a office flammable stowage locker.
That brought attention to an issue I felt was an issue to the top people who sign off on expensive purchases. 
Questions are asked from higher than my boss sometimes.  Explanations can be given.  State, City, Entity Fire Code.
I had a technical need to have a locker so it was a valid purchase.   

Next thing I know, inspections of the building and office spaces happens.  Oddly, infractions are found and I'm not sure why as my locker shows up and my office/shop space clears the State Mandated inspection of the building.  

My "new job" inventory of propellants (that disappeared from my office space before I arrived there to take over the position) came back to me.
By the time it did, my office space/shop could be in State compliance.  
I'm glad that "systems" move slowly sometimes.
Didn't even have to bring it up in a meeting with the group that needed to conform.  In this case, a building and several buildings on campus "updated" themselves to State Law.  I led the way.

I just read a few books about my new job position. 
Each State book raised more questions and lead to solutions in print that could possibly back me if needed at the State Institution I found myself employed by.

Kept reading past the indoctrination smudge printed "guidelines" that were handed out by the HR department and the references they desired for me to read.
Once I was backed by print, I could then "introduce" my superiors to some of their mis-understandings of the rules that were being violated that "they" (the royal they) are signing off on as being understood.  Change then happens rather rapidly.  Usually before the next eval cycle.

Yes, this does place one in a precarious situation(s). 
I'm fairly skilled at causing grand scale movement but now I have no "Bigger" movements to cause and effect ... which is good. 

I'll just walk till I turn 60 years old and figure it out.
Working to arrive on Springer Mtn 10/28/20.
Possibly I'll have an answer to the question:
What I'll be when I grow up ... finally I hope.  lol

Yes, it's been a long road from the times I've considered cashing it all in because of teen age confusion.  Having been in a good wreck and bounced my head around the cab of a F-150 with the multiple Evel Knievel bike, mini-bike, sledding, tree falling adventures and was still recovering I'm told.  At least it was admitted that I was coddled (mothered) to some point past the point of coddling.

Finding my way by the only way I knew I could trust ... Library's and Books.

Anything I've desired to do, someone else has most likely done.
Find their book(s) and read.
IF NOT
Then I do it and write the book along the way.
Possibly that is what is happening to me.  Following my Bliss.

And my closing this Christmas as I observed some of it close up:
Christmas does soften hearts.  I get that.
I just have an issue with the motives and how it is used.
If it's pro-Love then I'm cool with it.
If it's pro-Jesus junk, then I'm ... I'm ... allowing it to be what others need in their lives. Cash On Brothers, is all I can say! 

I understand that Jesus hung out and hung with sinners, 
or so I've read.  
I guess Him and I had a lot in common before age 32.  :)

Today's Christmas raises the balance sheets of business and industry.  America says Christmas again.  Give Trump a Thumb up Whoop!  

I'm enjoying my coffee and I'll just keep doing what I've been doing.  Crunches before coffee and a few miles during the day.
Reading the "Nitty Gritty Details" today and setting up my plan.

I'll soon find out what comes from my effort, @112 days from now when I set foot on the landing at the A.T. Train stop to read the bulletin board for any pertinent bear or storm data, going South.

That is all I have control over, so that is all my concern, as my web form letters to Mitch and Rand do matter little.  
I see no concern in their eyes just $$$ signs and a job they hate.  

The U.S. will be resolute in history and it is a bummer that I most likely will not be around 50 years from now if they seal the data to see what they hid.

I, like Colbert, will be eating good vegetables to see if I can make it that long ... 120 seems to be a good age to cash it all in.  :)
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.  Make it so!

~ Kindle

A shot from our 360 degree, Mast Camera.
Yesterday's sunset (still, the real looked much better) and today's view of across the way to the South.

I'm glad it's working, no I just have to do cable management before the next storm.  I've a few days before bringing it all down for the last time this season, hopefully.