noun mox·ie \ˈmäk-sē\
: the ability to be active
: courage or determination
(I sense this is going to be a long entry.)
I was reminded today of a word I've had to lean on hard lately for my own sanity. Moxie.
Several times seven, my inner positive talk was tested.
As of this past weekend, I'm officially being processed for lifetime disability.
This event and the process has been humbling.
Regardless of the outcome from the process, I have moxie and I will continue.
I will face this wall as all the others.
It will not stop me for I have four choices:
Over, Under, Around or Thru
I know I am not spineless - it hurts everyday.
I wrote on my FaceSpace wall these words:
"Pain is temporary.
Allowing the memory of it to linger and control one is a choice.
I choose to not be a victim."
This means, I know I am being healed.
The past is gone, the future remains to be seen;
I am NOW.
I will not become a victim of my own thoughts.
The inner "Committee" that tries to discuss my fate & has no business or control over me.
I've been using the "Catching the devil behind the third tree" techniques that I have learned from Guy Finley.
I'm thankful for the teachers, sages and masters I've listened to along the way. Each play their segments in my head when I need them most.
The pain I experience daily is not much different than the pain I know I'll experience when hiking any of our great trail experiences in this country.
Just right now, I don't have to do anything different than sit, stand, lie down or walk normally to get the same grand experience.
Yee Haw! I am a Cowboy! lol.
Still, I have no one to blame but myself and how rough I've treated my body through these past 55 years.
No regrets.
So here is my logic:
Since there is going to be pain, I already know it has it's peaks and non-peak times - I just move forward.
Greeting the day thankfully and with a smile! :)
I am thankful to get to experience another wonderful moment in space.
Yep, nothing is fixed - I float along with the orb we call Earth.
To transverse what we are still trying to figure out that is labeled the Universe, while enjoying each flooding moment of time that we are allowed to experience life in our own way.
Flowing with the stream and not fighting against it.
Each moment being a gift as it is appropriately known as the present.
I've been allowed to remain within this moment in recorded time with no Darwin award or trophy from my past and I'm not going to explore the possibilities of one ever being in my future.
I'm still here.
Bone headed choices made and all.
Hold my beer moments.
I breathe breaths that are given to me and I receive heartbeats that given to me as well.
I own nothing and I am thankful for all that I've been given and continue to receive.
I desire to live the "dash" in between October 28, 1960 and ?????
And when complete I desire the closing line to be:
"WOW! WHAT A RIDE!!!"
So to "Keep it simple" in getting from here to there: "To The Trail" (the essence of the blog to begin with) I am following my personal health orders to begin a walking routine.
No prodding at all, there actually has never been any guidance from the medical community about this part of my rehab.
Nor have I heard:
"Hey Buddy! You're FAT!"
Lose 75 pounds and you will put less stress on your joints!
BUT
you can bet I've been offered a boat load of pills though.I'm not going down that path.
I've watched my family and friends toxify themselves with that pollution.
Funny how they all passed on from Liver Cancer.
Dr.'s are the only ones who can bury their mistakes.
Pain or no pain - each day is a test and a chance for me to document my progress in a pain journal.
I am going to go deep within and seek healing.
The body is an amazing miracle.
It can self heal and I'm willing to do everything within my being to become a specimen of health.
This means I begin at the simplistic of wisdom:
“Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food.”
Keep it simple, keep it positive and keep moving forward, always forward.
1.7 to 2.1 miles each day.
First goal is to get to 10,000 steps a day.
I've logged 18.7 miles so far and it's been worth all the BioFreeze, Arnicare, Tart Cherry Juice, Turmeric and multiple Icing times I need to do to keep walking.
Now with this daily walking routine, I get to spend each day sauntering with my life long hiking partner Penny Grateful.
Hiking means we must be willing to walk each day.
Soon, new shoes will appear but in the mean time new inserts are on my radar.
Originally, "To The Trail" was set to document our journey from where we were at the time to what happened before we began hiking our first long distance trail.
It has become what I need to do to just do ANY walkway or path!
We live in a part of Eastern KY surrounded by National Forests and beautiful trails.
We have full use of 20 acres of a Southern Facing Mountain with a limestone cliff to scramble right behind the house.
What more could any future hiker dream of?
To be honest with you, I have an issue with walking down the steep drive way to get the mail each day.
Soon I'll be able to hike the perimeter of the land, clearing a hiking path.
I need a constructive strength goal to build towards; it is just me.
Here is my new routine:
Kindle's Rehab - DAILY LIFE.
Now, since I've achieved my first goal of hiking a path daily.....
(ok, it is a Senior Citizen Walking Path of .5 miles but it is a trail)
at least I've strung a few days together. ;)
I'm going to continue to do progress updates here as I also begin designing & creating our journey blog.
The triple crown and travel to all National Parks for starters.
Go big or go home! ;)
I'm not going to sit still and watch the "Price is Right" daily, I'm going to be active within my limits until those limits change.
Each day, striving to better my previous.
Ok, I'll be active in the morning and ice during the "Price is Right" then I'll continue to be active. :)
So now with a revised goal, we are onward to the trail!
Thank you Erin "Wired" Shiver for inspiring me to become a better blogger, hiker and person.
Actually, she does not know me from Adam but I just finished her long distance hiking blog which details her adventure of hiking the AT and thus completing the Triple Crown. (PCT, CDT, AT)
(if you care to read of her amazing adventures, here is a link:)
http://www.walkingwithwired.com/
I admire her ability to document daily and with no filters sometimes.
She kept it real and very reflective.
I begin where I am.
A fire builds within me to hike.
All it took was a spark.
I'm moving forward.
I'll keep ya posted.
~ Kindle
